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  1. #1
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    Does any one else get a little bit put out, not angry as such, just a bit why did you bother, when you go the trouble of answering a question from some one many times a "newby" and you get no response
    not even a thanks for replying, I attempt to make some make some sort of acknowledgment to my question

    ( or am I just getting old and grumpy and should shut up and go to bed )

  2. #2
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    Yes.

    We can't demand a reaction from others, but I must admit that when I post something and don't get much response I do wonder whether my post subjects not what others want to read these days.

    Michael

  3. #3
    BobL is online now Member: Blue and white apron brigade
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    Some folks are just out’n’out “takers” but I some times wonder if maybe they didn’t get exactly the answer they wanted to hear? On another mainly North American based forum the newbies seem a bit more respectful but maybe that’s a North American (NA) “politeness”. For the NA oldies, It takes a while longer for an outsider to establish cred on those NA forums but once you have it they seem to acknowledge it. Especially if you can provide detail and photos.

  4. #4
    BobL is online now Member: Blue and white apron brigade
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    I also just finished reading a challenging psychology book called “The courage to be disliked”. The basic premise is, in the long run it’s better to interact with others as a no obligation charitable, self rather than to seek constant approval or to be “liked” or thanked. The reason is that approvals thanks and likes are highly addictive and lead to shallow “quid pro quo” relationships and behaviors.

  5. #5
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    Quote Originally Posted by BobL View Post
    I also just finished reading a challenging psychology book called “The courage to be disliked”. The basic premise is, in the long run it’s better to interact with others as a no obligation charitable, self rather than to seek constant approval or to be “liked” or thanked. The reason is that approvals thanks and likes are highly addictive and lead to shallow “quid pro quo” relationships and behaviors.
    Ummm....thanks Dr Phil.....I have only just learned my ISO40 from NT40 so that might be a little deep for me..... LOL

  6. #6
    BobL is online now Member: Blue and white apron brigade
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    Yeah, sorry about the depth. Just to take it a little deeper. That approach to life was a major part of a 19th century psychologists view. His name was Adler, a contemporary of the more well known Freud and Jung. Adler lost out because he was far less self promoting and “prepared not to be liked” . 😀Interestingly Adler’s approach ha been resurrected in some therapy situations especially where Freud and Jung’s approaches do not appear to have worked all that well.

  7. #7
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    Quote Originally Posted by China View Post
    Does any one else get a little bit put out, not angry as such, just a bit why did you bother, when you go the trouble of answering a question from some one many times a "newby" and you get no response
    not even a thanks for replying, I attempt to make some make some sort of acknowledgment to my question

    ( or am I just getting old and grumpy and should shut up and go to bed )
    China
    I have empathy with you on this one.
    It is far more common practice than you might realise. There are those newbies who will realise you have made some effort to reply and thank you, others who don't and some who are so ignorant ,they don't give a rats.

    Here is an interesting exercise, go the the top of the page 3rd box down and click Community,then click Member list. Pick a random page,and click.

    The page should show members and how many posts they have made and the date . Once you scroll right down the page you can see how many have just a few posts and are never seen again.

    Try a few pages and see how many one shot wonders we have may helped.

    Grahame

  8. #8
    BobL is online now Member: Blue and white apron brigade
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    As you may know I’m really keen on decluttering the forums and I know there are some reasons against this but I often wonder why all these one post wonders aren’t, say after 2 years, agglomerate into one member and let’s even name it “1post1der” ?

    This would significantly cull down the membership and I don’t think we’d lose much or anything of value.

  9. #9
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    I better say thanks for the replies

  10. #10
    BobL is online now Member: Blue and white apron brigade
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    And Thanks for the thanks 👍

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    Hi Bob, Guys,

    Quote Originally Posted by BobL View Post
    Some folks are just out’n’out “takers” but I some times wonder if maybe they didn’t get exactly the answer they wanted to hear? On another mainly North American based forum the newbies seem a bit more respectful but maybe that’s a North American (NA) “politeness”. For the NA oldies, It takes a while longer for an outsider to establish cred on those NA forums but once you have it they seem to acknowledge it. Especially if you can provide detail and photos.
    I no longer bother with the USA forums. I find some of are them quite conceited, some have a "you can't do that I'm making money from it," attitude. Regardless you are always wrong even if you are not !

    Bob I hope you realise that you might have touched a nerve
    Best Regards:
    Baron J.

  12. #12
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    Hi Bob,

    Quote Originally Posted by BobL View Post
    As you may know I’m really keen on de-cluttering the forums and I know there are some reasons against this but I often wonder why all these one post wonders aren’t, say after 2 years, agglomerate into one member and let’s even name it “1post1der” ?

    This would significantly cull down the membership and I don’t think we’d lose much or anything of value.
    Not sure that I agree with that. I've watched clubs die simply because of a clique of members just didn't respond to new people, so the membership just dwindled.

    I used to play snooker and pool in a club. The more established players just didn't want to practice or play with less skilled members. I ended up as part of a team, we toured other clubs and we won many trophies. Consequentially the poorer players didn't want to play us. It was often "do you fancy a game. No just going down to the bar for a pint".
    Best Regards:
    Baron J.

  13. #13
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    Hi Guys,

    Just adding my two pennyworth here !

    I joined these forums to learn ! To take advantage of the fact that I don't know everything ! People have skills and knowledge that they have acquired over a lifetime. If those people have something to offer then I'm all ears. But that doesn't discount general chit chat, that is valuable too.

    On the other hand, I have skills and knowledge that others may not have. Re-reading some of my posts, they come across as tutorials. I try and pass on some of the knowledge that I have, that has been freely passed on to me and is gradually being lost because the people with those skills and that knowledge are no longer around. I would hope that I don't become boring, and if I did that someone would have the courage to tell me.

    It is this interaction that makes forums such as this a very valuable resource. Discouraging membership is not a good idea !

    JMTPW
    Best Regards:
    Baron J.

  14. #14
    BobL is online now Member: Blue and white apron brigade
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    I started on the US forum (BTW its a chainsaw forum and it’s not rocket science but it is full of “lore and so called ancient wisdom”) in 2007 and it took couple of persistent years to be “accepted”? My acceptance came about because enough members tried my recommendations and found out that they were worth doing and the posted about their successes.

    Since then I have about 7000 posts on that forum and have been less active in the last 6 years but every few months I still get a PM and an occasional request to comment on a thread or a “where are you”?

    I have been fortunate to meet a couple of Canadian members when I visited there in 2010-11. I’ve also lived in the US/Canada for a few years so have some understanding of how they think. It’s too easy to take the Mickey so you have to be gentle.

    BTW if my posts on these forums hit an occasional nerve, I figure if I’m more helpful than I am a PITA then maybe that’s OK? I just wish I had done more MW over my lifetime to have better actual hands on experience than I have.

  15. #15
    BobL is online now Member: Blue and white apron brigade
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    My guess is 99+% of 1post1ders never come back to the forums ever again. Maybe it could be stated up front when new members join If they don’t post something every 2, or even 5 years, then their membership will lapse? I doubt we’d lose too many useful members that way. Anyway I’m not that fussed about it.

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